at some point soon, the world will expect ashton kutcher to jump out and say, "you've been punk'd!"
but it's not gonna happen. so don't hold your breath.
seriously, has there ever been anything more fake and a bigger charade than this?
you know, besides this guy's teeth?
how far does he have to go to prove his masculinity? is something like this just around the corner?
DETROIT - Tom Cruise said that he ruthlessly beat his virgin fiance Katie Holmes with a tire iron and then took her from behind in front of seven truck drivers.
Cruise, speaking at a news conference with a bruised and bandaged Holmes, said: "Yes, I made her submit. And I have the seven gentlemen witnesses here to prove my virility."
"Today is a magnificent day for me," he said. "I've imposed my will on a magnificent woman."
Asked if anything new is around the corner for this superstar couple, he said, "I cannot answer that without checking with my publicist."