how even with a broken heart i can make this real simple

let's say i'm an architect in charge of building amazing houses. i hire a general contractor to put the pieces together. his job is to find the crew and to get the finest supplies.

as we're building, i have big concerns about the bricks that our general contractor purchased. they seem rather flimsy. in fact, they keep falling apart. and it comes to no surprise to me that, just as our house is about to be finished, suddenly it all collapses.

now, i need to apologize to my benefactors over this. so i state how disappointed i am, and how we'll get to the bottom of this and vow that it will never happen again.

our general contractor analyzes the collapse, and decides that the bricks weren't wrong, but rather how the bricks were applied. at least, that's got to be his plan, mostly because he very slightly changes the bricks. i mean, they're still the same bricks, but changed in a way where it really doesn't make much of a difference.

however, my general contractor doesn't get around to firing the bricklayer until halfway through our new house is being built. you know, because if it wasn't the bricks fault, then it was the fault of the person who laid them down. but he finally makes the change, and it seems like the new bricklayer has got it going right, but sooner rather than later, the bricks continue to seem flimsy, and they keep falling apart.

and again, just as our amazing house is about to be finished, the whole damn thing collapses again.

so it's been two years now, and i've got no amazing house to admire.

so i know it's not the bricklayer's fault. hell, we've used two different bricklayers, and the house still collapses. so, using the basic rules of the process of elimination, i can point the finger at the general contractor, as in, the dude who chose the bricks. after all, i saw with my own eyes how the same damn bricks keep falling apart two straight years.

so what do i do? well, if it were up to me, i sure as hell wouldn't do this. that would be idiotic - especially since i'd make sure that the second attempt at building a house was a roaring success and not another collapse.

but that's just me, someone taking a logical view on how to build a house. it's obviously a much more insane train of thought for those who just sell them.

how the west coast proves it's the best coast yet again

the best thing about being up late getting wedding stuff done and listening to tony paige and ed coleman on WFAN at 4AM except that i'm living on the west coast where it's just 1AM is that i'm the first in my family to hear that willie randolph has been fired by the mets. and it'll be another three hours until anyone else back in staten island will learn about it. so eat some of that, dad, mike and uncle joe. i'm 3000 miles away, and i am first.

for the record: this year wasn't willie's fault. he played with the old and brittle lineup he was handed. and the way omar and the wilpons went about with the prolonged and media-fueled extermination was nothing but bush league. you don't send a good man across the country to manage a game, win the game, and then fire him when you had a whole homestand to do it. and, on top of that, he's now got to fly back home on a five-hour flight, deal with the media when he lands, deal with the media at shea, deal with the packing his office up, deal with the media when he leaves shea for the last time - all this while battling jet lag - well, that's completely undignified and inhumane for a classy and respected new yorker with decades of honorable service with both the mets and yanks. poor willie deserves so much better than the weeks of paranoia and torture and inconvenience that he got.

all that being said, he also deserved to get canned this past winter, where i still and will always hold him primarily responsible for that awful collapse.

it's just that the way omar, the wilpons and the rest of the stooges did this leaves a horrible, bitter taste in my mouth.

i'm not feeling so good to be a mets fan today.

how i know it could get worse, and i just don't think it's gonna get any better

after today's excruciating 1-0 mets loss to the nationals, causing the lowly nats to take 3 out of 4, and dropping the mets record since last june 1 to 74-75, i've got to say that i've come to the realization that the mets are what they are: a .500 ballclub that just doesn't play hard for their coach, and just doesn't seem like they care enough about winning.

and it pains me to say that.

and, the worst part about it is that i'm not alone.

"This team is simply not fun at all to watch or even follow. It’s a flat, joyless team and watching them play is like watching a Snuff film…..only a real sick bastard would take joy in watching."

"Schmoozer on a roll. Just called Willie Art Howe."

"We are losing and being embarrassed at home. Yes we are 2 games out of first but you have got to think about how fortunate we have been in regard to the other teams in the division. I have long given up my fight against the booing because frankly theres nothing anyone can do about it but at the same time i understand the frustration. Something is missing and i hope they find it before its too late."

"i consider myself a die hard mets fan. but in reference to your point, matt, today i actually did reach the decision that it is time for me to start tuning out. at least to some degree. i’ve maybe missed watching/listening to 10-15 games over the last 3 years. but i’ve reached a point where i’ve realized that watching this team day in and day out thinking that maybe today is the day where they start playing the baseball we’ve all been led to believe that they’re capable of is a fool’s pursuit. instead, i just feel angry and pissed off half the time (the days they lose), because this team is, as we all know, no better than a .500 team."

"We can’t wait any longer. This team is in a complete downward spiral on and off the field. Its brought to our attention again today how divided the clubhouse seems to be. The once great chemistry this team had is completely gone and this team is completely lost...How quickly things can change. Seemed like just yesterday I was walking out of Shea stadium with the feeling of hope and optimism. The feeling like this was going to be our chance at a World Series and a chance to finally stand side by side with Yankee fans...There is a cancer on this team. I don’t know if its a player or players or manager or whatever but something has destroyed this team from inside. Omar needs to fix this right now or he is the one to blame. We’ve been screaming foul for almost a year now and you haven’t been listening. Omar Do you even know your own team?"

"Willie deserves a lot of blame but it comes down to this with me. You remove Willie, I’m not sure this team improves. This leads me to feel that the problems with this team go far beyond Willie...This team needs an enema. I’m just not sure where the hose should go."

look, i don't know what can be done. fire willie? i'm fine with that. turn heilman into a starter? sure, go ahead. get moises some at bats at first base? go ahead.

but is that really gonna change the culture? is that really going to make it seem like the players give a crap? i know they do, but do they care more than the phillies or the rays or the marlins? i don't think so. by the looks of things, it's obvious.

i hope omar doesn't wait to see how this shakes out. we have already, and it's a heartbreaker.

how i can't wait for the official unveiling on february 16

it's true. a pitcher can say a thousand words, and most of them are unrelentingly joyous.

how as a mets fan

i still sincerely hope that derek jeter, bernie williams, jorge posada and mariano rivera are not fingered in the mitchell commission report. those guys transcend the pinstripes they wear.

and, of course, beyond any sort of measurement standards, i obviously pray to the best of my abilities that david wright and jose reyes come out scott free too.

how only omar can turn a steaming bowl of crap into a starting catcher

good riddance to you, guillermo mota.

and good riddance to you, willie randolph's insane loyalty to guillermo mota.

i will not miss either of you.

how this better be the first of many apologies

From Mets COO Jeff Wilpon:

To Mets Fans:

All of us at the Mets are bitterly disappointed in failing to achieve our collective goal of building upon last year’s success. We did not meet our organization’s expectations - or yours. Everyone at Shea feels the same range of emotions as you - our loyal fans - and we know we have let you down. We wanted to thank you for your record-breaking support of our team this year…

Equally important, Ownership will continue its commitment in providing the resources necessary to field a championship team. Omar will be meeting with Ownership shortly to present his plan on addressing our shortcomings so that we can achieve our goal of winning championships in 2008 and beyond…

You deserve better results…

Many thanks again for your record-breaking support.


that's just the tip of the iceburg, buddy. you've got a lot of work to do to earn our trust back.

how if sports isn't important, then why am i completely devastated

this is going to be the longest of winters.

i don't even have the heart to watch the giants-eagles game tonight, in fear of another emotional stabbing.

how it's a good tihng i'm not in new york right now

because there would have been a good chance i'd be on the 59th street bridge, fighting for space on the ledge with the rest of the other mets fans.

they've pushed us to that.

i hate this.

how we need any sort of uplift we can get nowadays

from my brother: "instead of being sour about the mets today, i used this classic movie clip to cheer me up. it always works."

yes, mike. that helped. and to that, i add this to the mixture.

how i fear that it's just too late to turn this around

all summer long, met fans have heard that smug attitude from our management, when we weren't playing hard and the bullpen wasn't getting guys out, that smug attitude of willie randolph when he would say, "it's okay, we're still four games up". but it was obvious that things were not okay, and we were fortunate that the phillies and braves were just as incompetent.

it was too complacent. from the outside, we all saw the danger signs.

and now, it's too late. we should have tried philip humber and mike pelfrey in the bullpen to see what they've got and to give us innings (instead of tiring out the retreads we have right now in an effort for them to "find themselves"). we should have benched players when they slagged off instead of "it's okay, it's a long season and we're still in first place, they'll get through it". we should have tinkered. we should have prodded. we should have experimented.

now, it's too late. and we're still sending guillermo mota out there, hoping he'll figure it out. but he won't. he sucks. period. how much proof do we need?

humber should have gotten his feet wet in july in the bullpen, instead of throwing him out there in late september in the thick of a pennant race.

we should have seen what collazo and muniz could do in august.

we should have pressured jobs.

we shouldn't have sat still and found solace in our fortunate position.

instead, the "it's okay, we're still in first place" complacency set in. and now i fear it's too late. the arms are tired and there's no answers anymore.

i just had to get that off my chest.

how i'm struggling to put my emotions into words

but this season is going down in an historical fiery collapse.

you can blame willie for his torre-like mismanagement of the bullpen. you can blame omar for his insane contracts given to shoeneweis and mota. you can blame duaner sanchez for not being in shape and missing the year. you can blame jose for completely screwing the pooch this final month. and you can blame delgado and loduca for completely sucking ass.

but i'm tired of blaming.

i just want to see them hold a lead for once.

is that too much to ask?

how it's difficult to get off the stuff that'll kill you once you get a sniff of it

from metsblog.com:

The Orioles, and O’s co-GM Jim Duquette, purchased the minor league contract of RHP Victor Zambrano from the Pittsburgh Pirates for cash considerations.

poor jim duquette. someone's gotta organize an intervention.

how there's very few birthday gifts for my dad

that can compare with pedro's first start in port st. lucie, even if it's just rehab.

of course, it will pale in comparison to pedro's first start in shea stadium, but that's a couple of weeks off, and it won't be his birthday anymore.

anyways, happy birthday, dad. and viva la pedro.

how i'm gonna stand up on my sports pulpit

and offer my somewhat expert opinion on a couple of varied subjects.

1. METS ACQUIRE LUIS CASTILLO
i don't know how anyone can have a problem with this. we're getting a solid hitter in the two-hole with great speed and who makes contact, which makes him ideal to hit behind josejosejosejose...jose...jose, and he just so happens to sport a couple of gold gloves. and we barely gave up anything for him other than taking on his salary. look, i know some met fans want to see what ruben gotay's got to offer at second. but seriously, we got him for nothing in the offseason, and we were able to designate him for assignment a couple of months ago without anyone offering to pick him up. and now that's he's hitting, for what accounts for a brief stretch, does anyone really feel comfortable about him in the playoffs? honestly? he might turn out to be a nice player. but he's not one right now. castillo is a really good baseball player, and he's got two rings to his credit. he's a super upgrade over what we had hours ago. great job, omar. and thank you.

2. CELTICS TRADE FOR KEVIN GARNETT
a couple of years ago, the lakers augmented their duo of shaq and kobe with karl malone and gary payton, giving them four superstars in their starting lineup. the problem was that they only had one ball to share among four guys who demand it, and they wound up short of a championship, getting walloped by the pistons. now, the celts have three superstars, except instead of just matching them up without any foresight into what makes a team work, they're all unselfish. and they all seem to complement their skills extremely well. and they're all hungry for a championship. as a knicks fan, i don't like this one bit. still, are they gonna get their title? no. no way. the rest of their team just isn't up to it. yeah, they're gonna run all over the weak eastern conference, but then they'll get run over by another great three: nash, marion and amare. or duncan, parker and manu. or maybe just yao and t-mac. but it'll be a damn good run by three very likeable superstars who will prove that three great players can indeed play together greatly.

3. MICHAEL STRAHAN THREATENS RETIREMENT
i've never been as uninterested for the beginning of football season as i am right now. from tom coughlin being around to jerry reese making very little upgrades during his first offseason to watching eli not get any coaching yet again to no tiki to save us and now, to this, strahan bitchin' again about something. yeah, i'm gonna be there in front of the telly watching the g-men play the cowboys in the season opener on that sunday night, but let's face it, they're just not very likeable right now - especially strahan, who should be winding down and bathing in the final days of a legendary career, but instead, is going down like a spoiled brat. a really spoiled brat. one that's trying to swindle his team into helping him pay off his horrible divorce settlement. i'm just tired of it all, and the season is still a month away. great.

how i've been meaning to post this

but i've been really busy at work and just haven't had the time.

but now that i do have a second, i feel like jose reyes waiting for shawn green at home plate after his walkoff home run to beat the cardinals.

it's never a bad thing to feel like jose.

how bragging rights now has a color scheme

i just read about this on metsblog.com, and i think this is a fantastic idea.

News: Subway Series In Lights

Paul Bodi of MLB.com reports for the first time in its history, the Empire State Building will split its tower lights.

According to Bodi, starting Friday night the famous New York City landmark will be lit in Mets blue and orange on the east and west sides of the building, while the north and south sides will be lit in Yankees' blue and white.

Bodi also notes the team who wins the series will have their colors displayed on all fours sides on Monday.

that means orange and blue.

dress accordingly.

how $20 and some good timing got me some great seats for an armando benitez meltdown

for $19 less than the price on the ticket, i sat in lower box 113, row 29, purchased from a season ticket holder who decided to use his corporate seats instead. i just so happened to be at the right place at the right time. and those seats got me in the right place for seeing exactly what i hoped to see.

after benitez walked jose reyes, two giants fans in front of me got up, turned around and proceeded to leave while saying, "yep, i've seen this crap before".

a game-winning david wright double later, and they couldn't be any more correct.

thank you, lord, that #49 is now wearing the other team's jersey.

here's my seats for the meltdown:

how a giants fan threw peanuts at me

then again i didn't really mind much, since we were just one billy wagner fastball away from this:

how i learned a couple of things at the ballpark

my thoughts after watching the mets get shallacked by the giants, 9-4, on an absolutely gorgeous night in san francisco:

1. you only need to hit a ball 363 out of the 364 feet to left center to be awarded a home run.

2. the largest HD screen in the world is the big scoreboard at sbc park, and it's one of the most impressive things you will ever watch.

3. i don't think carlos beltran has hit a curveball since adam wainwright threw one past him last year. seriously. he hasn't.

4. i can't remember the last time my softball team gave up nine runs in an inning.

5. or gave up three homers in an inning.

6. or made two embarrassing errors like that, back-to-back.

7. when barry zito's got his curveball dealing, there's very few things as pretty to admire in an athletic contest. (okay, i saw zito pitch live a bunch during his cy young year, so this was really just a reminder).

7. i never leave a ballgame early. but if i were to, it would be on a night that bengie molina hits two home runs in one inning.